Gun to my head

Keeping in line with the fact that this is a blog, I chose this title.

Today, I experienced for the first time, a gun pointed towards me, creeping out from the passenger’s hand on a bike. I was the sole front row seat at a point blank gun point robbery. So now I not only have heard about it in the papers, in the news, from people who have experienced it like my friends and family, but now, I have experienced it as well.

The sad part is that it’s not shocking or surprising that it happened. It’s almost like the feeling of inevitabilty was always there. I just wasn’t prepared for the metal in my face. I was needless to say, stirred, shaken. It isn’t something I’ve prepared for. Having a gun inches away from me looking in my direction.

I am not perturbed at the material loss ( a cell phone and some cash ). I am actually finding myself being thankful that the people who held me up weren’t maniacs. The kind that you do hear about. Who at times get frustrated if you are not a valuable catch, and as a outlet of that frustration, shoot you.

Also, kind of sadly, I found myself to be perfectly alright within a couple of hours. Life goes on. Part and parcel of the world we live in. It is sad that we are saying it’s part and parcel of the world we live in when IT is in fact being robbed and your life being threatened.

I would be naive to think that these people are the scum of the earth. What they are doing is wrong. Without a doubt. But to judge their roots and character to be evil, is also wrong. Like I said, it is also frustration. And that’s what makes the entire thing so dangerous. It becomes more dangerous when the economy in which these things happens, starts to lose balance. When inflation starts to hit highs. When people find suddenly that eating once a day also is now a difficult challenge. When you have this sinking feeling that your country is the ship whose steering wheel is broken, it’s heading for that huge ice berg waiting to rip it apart, and only the people controlling the ship ( the government and the so called national and political leaders ) are the only ones who know about it. The passengers, at the moment are just trying to deal with the bad service and the some of the stowaway crooks. I know, way too much of a metaphor.

The Long March, The Generals and the Dark Prince

I admit first of all that i have taken the liberty of borrowing the ‘Dark Prince’ nickname given to Mr. 10 % from elsewhere, but one has to admit. It suits him.

OF the last month or two, one thing which has become more evident then ever before is that we as a nation are obsessed with politics, even if it is just so that we can unload a bag full of curses and let out steam. So much so, that our media, has more coverage of the Political Leaders in their news then of our national leaders. One can easily tend to forget that Mr. Gilani is actually the Prime Minister of Pakistan. President Musharraf of course is cursed with being in media time and again of late with something being thrown against him, so he is there, but not so much so in the capacity of a president but rather in the capacity of being a victim of Character Assasination attempts.

Nawaz Shariff has found a second wind in putting down the ex-general, and what’s more, this time he has brought along some of the other ex-generals along for the ride. We have been given a dose of ex servicemen, mostly Generals, coming on various platforms, revisiting Kargil, and calling for the trial of treason for the ex-COAS. Of course these were the very same generals who were there side by side at the time of the said event. And were just as much a party to it as anyone.

The army, has always I maintain been a solid institution overall, minus some of the top brass taking over national affairs from time to time in the history of our country. This was proven, when after these generals came out with their so called ‘opening the pandora’s box’, some of the other ex-servicemen, not those who have taken any FAVORS from Musharraf in the past, came out with logic, and evidence and blasted the likes of Gen. (R) Jamshed Gulzar and comapany and of course Nawaz Shariff.

It is sad to see the Army, the foundation of this solid institution of country, crumbling towards politics like this. Not those still in service, but those who are retired. And even if they are retired, they still hold a duty to all that they have served and to this country to maintain and uphold that spirit of the armed forces. Especially those who have served in senior positions. No good can come from bringing your own country’s and your own establishments name in great doubt. If these Generals, DEMAND the arrest and trial of General Musharraf, than let us not forget, as the respected Governer said, these generals have files of themselves as well. And these can be brought in front of public. Anything they accuse Musharraf of, will go without question for themselves as well.

Coming back to Mian sahab. He has turned his focus soley on getting his revenge, and soley proving that he is still just as big a moron as he was before. I feel pity for those honest souls who get fooled by him. His great showing at the long march in Lahore, just to give one speech and then return to his humble abode… was shameful. Chotay Mian is acting much more sensibly one feels. I’ve said it once before and I would like to say it again, and especially DEMAND an answer from Nawaz Shariff. How, and a complete and elaborate explanation beyond just the puffy words of this country’s integrity and spirit etc, just HOW is the restoration and this struggle for the restoration of the Pre Nov 3rd judiciary ensure the solution of the much more ongoing crisis of the economy of the country, like inflation, and poverty and power and water shoratges? Does he actually expect us to believe that the moment the judges resume duty eveything will be solved, magically ? I am mentally tired of this Focus on the Politics and Power ( controlling not energy) issues in the form of judicial crisis and all springing up when all the budget announced for combating the poverty level really was to announce giving 1000 Rs. to the poorest of the poorest families. How the hell is the judiciary more important than that crisis? How?

And finally, coming to the Dark Prince. I must admit, he has learned a lot in his time away and in prison. He has learned how to play his cards. Mr. Zardari is currently the Big Boss man, flying off to Saudi accompnying our Premier, holding sessions of the cabinet of Sindh and of course time and again holding press conferences. He’s not even a part of the government. He’s not a national leader, he is a political leader. A political leader of theatrical misfortune. Fortune for him, misfortune for Pakistan and some and trust me a rare breed of commendable politicians (note: Makhdoom sahab). He’s biding his time, for I do sincerely believe he is simply carrying out for a greater plan at hand, working in the background. One can’t help but feel that there some great foul play at hand in all of this. You just don’t feel right about anything to do with out country’s system and working at the moment. Like I said earlier, one can almost forget that we have a PM by the name of Yusuf Raza Gilani.

May Allah’s mercy stay with the people of this nation. Ameen.

The Saga Continues..

The mills of chess are churning all around this fair land we call Pakistan. The players are plenty. The moves are plenty. The ones losing are the people.

The new government, the coalition government was formed, in March. There were hails and shows of strength all around the country. The nation was hoping beyond hope for a period of calm. For a period of consolidation. But alas. The much touted and of course at the same time, tainted marraige of the PPP and the PML-N came to an almost end. If it’s not a divorce then it surely is a seperation.

The judges issue, having not been resolved beyong the deadline (2nd deadline) of May 12th, the PML-N, under the conspicous leadership of Mr. Nawaz Shariff decided to leave the government. With the budgets around the corner, this is a decision which will, or rather should surely be questionned as to whether it really was in the better interests of the country of was it in the better interests of a Power hungry back from exile leader.

Power shortages continue. Inflation continues. Food shortages continue. The government continues to borrow. And the effects will be there for us to bear next year as well mind you. So really, to what benefit is this struggle to get Mr. Iftikhar back and restored when the masses are suffering ? Do these old stalwarts of the political cosmo of our country really expect us to believe that as soon as the judiciary is restored to Pre Nov 3rd, all problems will go away.

They wont. And yes, I am saying it, the wisdom of our political leaders is best being used for their own gains. One has used it better than the other and more cunningly, which is what has gotten the other all pissed off. Of late Mr. Nawaz Shariff started his Anti Musharraff drive in full throttle yet again. Again, the wisdom of this act? No matter what one wants to say, it cannot be denied that the past 8 years have seen the country’s economy grow. Albeit there have been problems which were not properly addressed. And these weren’t minor problems. I am not defending him. But facts are facts and those are that the past 8 years have been 10 times better for us then the 90s ever were. And the 90s were a battle of musical chairs between PPP and PML-N. So really as far as I am concerned we are back to square one. Hopefully we will go in the right direction this time.

Mind you, of late the former CJ has been featuring in the news as well and making statements which really are more political then of the legal fraternity’s concern. The media is concerned with the politics, this can be measured in the countless number of ‘Political Talk Shows’ that come on the news channels. Mr. Hamid Mir of course being a popular watch. Why is that everyone is more concerned with the politics of this country and the way they are playing their chess game, rather than focusing on the problems of this country more grave in nature and more distorting the way of life of many people. Why aren’t the wise owls of this nation’s LEADERSHIP being questioned on these things and being brought to task. Why?

Focus on the power crisis, the shortages, the inflation. These are the real problems of the country, the rest is old news and I can safely say that the people are tired of it, and weary. And we want a change. I’ve said before in one of my posts and I will say it again. The old stalwarts, the shariffs, the choudry’s and yes, even the bhutto’s and the zardari’s need to go. They should be pushed out, forever. No strings attacthed. Just take your corrupt riches and leave us alone. We need new faces and fresh blood to govern this country.

Allah help us. All pray to Allah, for he is the most merciful.

Black Moon

Life, experiences a multitude of things. Love , anger, hate, lust, calm and panic. Just to list a few.

Of late,, night fall seems to be more intense. The sleeplessness always present. My imagination splattered in front of me. The darkness almost talking to me. Telling me ‘Stay calm, we will come soon’. And surprisingly that doesn’t scare me. In fact I’ve been sleeping after that. Almost as if I took valium.

But in all the suppressed calm and peace, I know in my heart, in the deepest corners of my sub concious that something is amiss. And this becomes more relevant when I look at the moon. I see a face in the moon. I can sense it being a familiar face, yet I don’t recognize it.

There was a deep sense of acknowldgement through the corridors of my heart for the face. And yet I can’t place this seemingly close person. I can sense hurt, sadness in me. I can sense an undeniable pain and still the face has no recognition.

I recall something of a crushing feeling, an emotionally crippling feeling. I want to cry and I want to scream. I start getting uneasy.

I feel myself going mad. Obsessed with an unknown desire. I see the face still without recognition. But I also remember the feelings of love, passion and happiness.

And then suddenly my memory train starts to go back. I remember. The face. The face of my love. My obsession. Our relationship. My turmoil. My tumutous overbearing passion and emotional wreckage. The hollowness between us. Then I see the moon go black. I see gun shots. I see bodies lying on the floor. Cold. Still. Laying in the static of the night. A black night. I see her face. Still. At peace. But dead. And the next, I see my own. Laying still. Static. In agony even without life. I see the black moon now, setting upon me.